Questions of a New Therapist
Being a new therapist is terrifying. And, like any emotion, that fear is not ‘bad’. It’s uncomfortable, and it can affect the work if we’re not mindful. But fear also shows how much we care, what’s important, and how much we want to learn. We are full of fear, and full of questions.
There’s been a shift in recent years from ‘therapist as a mysterious blank slate’ to many professionals being more open and honest about themselves (with boundaries, of course). Inspired by them, this is what I imagine someone recording my thoughts would have seen in my first year as a therapist. Or maybe: if there was a search engine for new therapists, these would show up. Some of them still do.
Did I really make that terrible pun
Are they doing construction during my session times on purpose
What machine even makes that noise
Noise bylaws
Cheapest noise cancelling headphones
Best noise machines
How to stop fidgeting
Quiet office fidgets
Blue light glasses
How to stop sitting like a cooked prawn
Is it okay to: reveal my politics / show pictures of my dog / not want to have a poker face
How do I not make a face when: the president is mentioned / my client’s ex’s name comes up
Maybe it’s okay to not have a poker face
At times like this
In times like these
How suicidal is too suicidal
Will I ever stop being scared for my clients safety
Is it maybe essential that I stay scared
Why is therapy not free
Why is therapy not mandatory for therapists
How can I be more like my supervisor
How can I be more like my coworker
How can I be more like me
How is it that I get to be a part of so many incredible peoples lives
Will I ever stop feeling overwhelmed by gratitude
How weird is it that people I don’t know hear my name often
How do I check in without being annoying
How do I have boundaries without feeling guilty
How has this person endured so much and stayed so bright
How do I open and close my heart
How do I say goodbye after we have shared so much
Did I say too much
Did I say too little